We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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