look no pants
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
