I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
It's official drugs can't kill me
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
