He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
either way he was missing a nipple.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
