Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Randomize