haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
