you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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