This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
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