is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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