belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
