a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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