Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
I just want nice things and good sex
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
