so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
