where does the pee come out of this thing
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
