I'm lost and stupid without you.
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
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