Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
