Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
