Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Randomize
