Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Randomize