What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
