I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Please, let me fuck your mom
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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