Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
