so explain again why im purple
no
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
i already hear my dad disowning me
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
