i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Randomize
