"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
Small penises have feelings too.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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