took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
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