five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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