Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize