Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
tell me about the eggs
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