Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
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