...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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