I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
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