i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Randomize
