Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
NoShamevember. You game?
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize