why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize
