Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
