What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
