I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Randomize
