In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Randomize
