Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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