It's Friday. Sex?
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
