The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
