I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize
