Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
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