omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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