So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Randomize
