you guys were way drunker than both of me
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize