I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
