OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize