he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
oh god the rape fog is back!
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Randomize
