this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
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